When You Reach The End Of The Road

Ruby

It finally happened.  Officially, I mean.  I’ve reached the end of the line.  After six-and-a-half years of extremely intensive psychiatric treatment, the first fiveish with an incredibly bright, creative, thinking-outside-of-the-box younger doc; the last year-plus with a man long experienced in the mood disorder game (not to mention numerous consults along the way), it has been made manifest.

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The struggle

the qiuet borderlineHi everyone,

I haven’t posted in a long time and my last post was extremely positive. Unfortunately I have truly crashed since then.

I have treatment resistant depression, BPD, AvPD and OCD. Sometimes I wonder if they’ll add any more diagnoses to my list. Continue reading

The Cost of Mental Health

MondayMaintaining your mental health is expensive. Medicine is expensive. Many of the antidepressants are generic now, but still cost about $1/pill without insurance. Lithium is much cheaper at 30 cents a pill. Prices on anxiety meds vary depending on if they are generic or not. But the antipsychotics… woah! I take Geodon, which recently went generic, and without insurance the cost is $379/month! Fortunately I only have to pay $76 because I have insurance. Even Lamictal runs $170/month generic. These are only some prescription prices. What do you pay in supplements that aren’t covered by insurance? Continue reading

When I Realised What I Do is Good

SailorThere are some things you may already vaguely know about me.  My real name is Carrie and I have an alternate personality whom I call Charlotte (not to mention the poor guy, Jack, in the back ground who hardly gets a say in anything).  I live in the UK near London, by the sea.  I am almost 30 years old.  I suffer from depression, I have recently been diagnosed with Emotional Dysregulation Disorder (the new name for BPD) and have lived with a host of psychiatric conditions since I was a child. 

I am also a Veterinary Nurse. Continue reading

I Am Not OK, But That Is OK

SailorI’ve been wondering recently (as always) why I am the way I am.

I’ve been trying to come up with an explanation.

It feels like I can’t help these ways.  I think the way I think because of all that I am, and all that has happened.  I feel like I use it as an excuse, but am I allowed to feel that way? Continue reading

While there’s life, there’s hope

SailorDum, dum de dum.

Where do I start?

Hello, my name is Hello Sailor, but you can call me Sailor.

I was shocked to be asked to join Canvas, but that doesn’t seem like a good starting point. Continue reading

Sensory Integration Dysfunction and Mental Disorder

Lulu newSensory Integration Dysfunction and Mental Disorder.

Most of my research in the past has been centered around affective disorders, theories surrounding the causation of dysfunction, and the cognition / behaviors that sustain it. I am broadening my horizons to include many mental health disorders and developmental disorder, particularly autism.

I have had a theory for awhile that hinged almost completely on curious connections I’ve made between bipolar disorder and autism spectrum disorder. Continue reading

Chicken, Eggs, And Alphabet Soup

RubyI actually began thinking about this yesterday, after reading something by our newest blogger, James Claims.  His post, Comorbid Migraines and Other Health Issues, as well as the comments it generated, started me writing in my head.  Then I read another post by our ManicMusesAbilify and Agoraphobia?, and since I couldn’t sleep for the thoughts doing a tumbling routine in my mind, I decided I should write it all out and share it with you (you’re welcome).

In James‘ post he mentioned migraines specifically.  In ManicMuses‘ she spoke more about anxiety disorders. Continue reading