Did You Know Momma is Depressed?

Click to read Jennifer's bio

Click to read Jennifer’s bio

The receptionist thought it would be a good idea to schedule my physical at the same time as my three daughters’.

Since you all have to come in anyway . . . she’d said.

In theory, yes.

In reality? Imagine keeping three ping-pong balls from smashing into each other or the four very close walls of the examination room and you are nearly there. Add a reflex hammer to the equation and you’ve just about got it. Continue reading

Advertisements

No Refills

Click to read Jennifer's bio

Click to read Jennifer’s bio

Does anxiety make us do stupid things? Or do our stupid actions cause anxiety?

As I roll around this spastic hamster wheel of my own creation, I realize it probably doesn’t matter. The result is the same. Utter and complete exasperation. Heart-pounding worry. Multiple imagined scenarios of worst cases.

I forgot to order my meds. Again.

Every few months, I find myself staring down the empty bottle neck of my meds.

It shouldn’t sneak up on me like this. My physician, insurance company, and I have a nice, little arrangement for ourselves. She writes the script, they fill it, I retrieve it from the mailbox. Couldn’t be any less painless. Continue reading

Anxie-ME

Jennifer
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
I make people uncomfortable.

I make people squirm.

I remind people of those dark corners of themselves they’d like to forget. Continue reading

EVER the Twain Shall Meet

JenniferFor a long time, it was as if I lived two lives.

Parallel, and at times, intersecting, but to all those save a close few – totally distinct.  One hidden from the other; one nonexistent except for the shadow it cast on my life.

When I could get out from under it, it was much easier for even me to pretend that shadow life didn’t exist. I wasn’t suffering.  I wasn’t having trouble coping.  I didn’t need help.  Certainly, no one needed to know about it. Continue reading