So, Rene Descartes is sitting at the bar, finishing his beer. The barkeep walks over to him and asks, “Want another?”
Descartes answers, “Mm, I think not” – and vanishes.
The reason I opened with a joke (it is supposed to be a joke) is that among the various mental health issues I struggle with is some fairly serious and long-time social anxiety. There isn’t a social engagement full of people from which I wouldn’t want to simply vanish.
More on the mental health in a bit, though.
I’m Dad to two wonderful tween/teen girls. I’m lap, scratching post, waiter, and housekeeper to two marvelous cats. I’m boyfriend and soulmate to Summer Solstice Girl. Forty-five years into it (as of this writing), my life has been one of health, comfort, and peace. Seriously, relative to many millions (billions?) of humans, I’ve had it very good. The thing is, though, I’ve not been living. I’ve taken everything as it has come and never challenged life or asked for more from it.
That’s changing. With Claudia by my side, I expect to be living the next 45 years, not merely existing.
All that aside, the reason I’m here writing for Canvas is that I have some fairly disruptive mental health issues keeping from a full life even with SSG. Depression and various forms of anxiety have, I now know, afflicted me all of my adult life, though only in the last few years have I realized it or acknowledged it. Now that I’m facing it, I have a legion of (well, four) professionals assisting me, am currently taking four medications, and am jumping in to the deep end of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), all of which seems to be keeping me at a more consistent emotional level than I was, say, a year ago. Bad moments and bad days still appear as menacing monsters, but I’m handling them and am learning more all the time.
Questions or comments are always welcome, as they are at my personal blog, UnFocused.
My blog: UnFocused
© Sid Dunnebacke and A Canvas Of The Minds 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Sid Dunnebacke and A Canvas Of The Minds with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.